We know the temptations that hunt us, the ones we can't seem to outrun no matter how serious we get about our interior life. In this episode, John Heinen and Devin Schadt walk through a practical four-temptation framework with the corresponding virtues that combat each one. From lust as a disordered desire rather than a foreign attack, to the "respectable sin" of greed we praise as ambition, to the pride we cannot see in ourselves, to the sloth hiding inside our busiest days.

John Sablan spent the better part of his adult life being what he now calls the X factor in his family: the one holding everything back. Raised in abuse, living a wayward life, he and his wife stumbled into the Catholic Church, and he settled comfortably into being lukewarm. His marriage came to the edge. Then at a men's conference, with a general confession, and a priest praying deliverance over him in Latin changed the trajectory. In this conversation, John Heinen and Devin Schadt sit down with John Sablan to get at the real roots of what's keeping men soft and what it actually takes to do something about it. Rooted in Thomistic psychology (which he studied under Fr. Chad Ripperger), John defines effeminacy the way Aquinas did: not a personality flaw, but a moral vice. The inability to deny pleasure in order to pursue the arduous good. He unpacks the trap men fall into when they finally decide to get serious: trading softness for stoicism, white-knuckling virtue as a self-improvement project, making the whole thing about proving themselves rather than serving God. They also tackle why "do you want to save your marriage?" is the wrong question.