We are living in a time when men are besieged from all fronts.  Men have a suicide rate three times higher than women which many attribute, at least in part, to men equating asking for help with portraying vulnerability in a society where vulnerability is equated with weakness and not being a real man.  As […]

“It’s good to be king” was a common refrain in my home, and it was always in reference to me. I was a 5-year-old boy, who, my parents joked, got the royal treatment. My mother and father cooked for me, cleaned for me, and made sure I went to bed early. I was capable of […]

I’ll never forget the night my first child was born. I was racing down the freeway before dawn, clutching the steering wheel.  “Look out for deer,” Brittany moaned. I glanced at her sideways.  “You’re in labor, and you’re worried about deer?” “Just watch out for deer, okay!” I squeezed the steering wheel until my knuckles […]

  Bob came to me feeling very discouraged.  He had slipped again into viewing pornography.  He wanted to be completely honest about it and tell his wife; however, he didn’t know how to do it.  He knew she would be very angry and disappointed.  He didn’t want to hurt her, but he knew he had […]

I’ve never been good at initiating hugs. I’m pro-hugging, and very much so, it’s just that I’ve always felt awkward with being the first to spread his arms and move in for the hug. “Zubair,” Louis Coker, OFS, would say before spreading his arms and moving in on me, “my brother.” He had a knack […]

If it has been awhile since you’ve read The Tempest, it is definitely worth a re-read. If you haven’t ever read The Tempest…then how can you call yourself a gentleman? The play is about a man named Prospero. He is the former Duke of Milan who was betrayed and exiled by his brother to a […]

“How did you go from Islam to Catholicism?” I’ve been asked that several times since my confirmation in 2012. I don’t mind answering this question at all. The problem has typically been that I’ve been asked this in such a setting in which I’ve only had only a few minutes to give an answer. The […]

This post is part of an ongoing series on healing from pornography addiction. Read more posts in this series here. One of the most difficult obstacles to overcome for both the pornography user and his/her spouse is shame.  In order to understand shame, we need to distinguish it from guilt:  Guilt:  An emotion that focuses […]